The Practical Pig

Dialogue Fifer Pig and Fiddler Pig: You’re the pork sausage! You’re the pork sausage! Big Bad Wolf: Pork sausage, hm-m-m, pork pie! [comes to the pigs, then he dresses up like a mermaid while playing his harp and vocalising] Fifer Pig and Fiddler Pig: Look! A mermaid! Three Wolves: I can’t wait! Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! It’s gonna be yummy! Big Bad Wolf: They’re in the bag. In the bag! [shows a bag of two pigs, the wolves come, then he pushes them away from the pigs] TAKE YOUR TIME! TAKE YOUR TIME! Big Bad Wolf: “Dear brother, we’re in trouble-“ [mumbles, then one wolf spreads mustard onto a pig’s leg] <big><big><big><span style=color:red;>HEY!!</span></big></big></big> [blows them away] Remember, no eats till pop gets back. Three Wolves: Okay, pop. [chop two pigs to a container with a clover] Fifer Pig and Fiddler Pig: Why don’t you mind your papa? Practical Pig: <span style=color:red;>Where are my brothers?!</span> Big Bad Wolf: Your brothers?! Never heard of them! Big Bad Wolf: I AIN’T- [looks at the meter, then replies to The Practical Pig] Now listen, buddy, you’ve got to be wrong, why? I’m your pal! [the whistles blow, and multiple traps punish him. Cuts to the Wolves’ windmill, the two pigs are inside a pie] Fifer Pig, and Fiddler Pig: You’ll be sorry when your pop gets back, and we ain’t here. Three Wolves: Huh, we’ll be sorry. [all laugh] Wolf #1: Wait we forgot the pepper! Wolf #2: The pepper? Wolf #3: The pepper! Wolf #1: The pepper! [sprays a load of pepper onto the pigs, causing them to sneeze, then the wolves get stuck in a pie, then the pigs run out of the windmill. Cuts back Practical's house, the wolf is shouting] Big Bad Wolf: NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! I AIN’T- WHOA! DON’T DO THAT! PLEASE STOP! OH GOODNESS ME! PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH ME ANYMORE! OH MY GOSH! NO! NO! NO! NOOOO! THEY’RE IN THE OLD MILL!!!!!!!!!!! [a cuckoo bird plays a harp] They’re in the old… <span style=color:blue;>the old mill…</span> External Links