Rocko's Modern Life/Season 1

Rocko's Modern Life is an American animated series premiered on September 18, 1993 to November 24, 1996. The series follows a Wallaby named Rocko and his friends, Heffer and Filburt. Episode 1 A Sucker for the Suck-O-Matic [1.1a] Rocko Rama: I had it with you, you're a useless and pathetic like a USELESS AND PATHETIC thing, this is the last straw you Good for nothing heap of rubbish! [holds up a hammer and starts hitting the suk-u-lox] Prepare to FEEL MY WRATH! [Spunky gets afraid] That will teach you! Heffer Wolfe: Hey man, keep it down. I'm trying to watch TV. Rocko: I must cease this senseless sucking. It's stuck in suck! Rocko and Heffer: "How to turn off your Suck-o-Matic..." [the page gets sucked up, and the page that reads...] ..."In case Suck-o-Matic sucks instructions, see page 101..." [another page gets ripped and is sucked, a page shows a skull on fire] "PREPARE TO DIE"?! [Rocko, Heffer and Spunky scream as eyes bulge in horror] Canned [1.1b] Filburt Shellbach: The problem with the comic books is the ink comes off on your hands. Everytime you turn a page, you have to wash your hands. You turn a page, you wash your hands. You turn a page, you wash your hands. And then you turn a page... [The speaker starts coughing on Rocko] Speaker: Rocko, to the... [coughs] ...Manager's Office. [then it finishes coughing] Filburt: They've hurt very much and, um, I'm constantly in a state of wanting to throw up. Geek: You'll never be satisfied with a mortal woman because the elf wenches are so beautiful You'll spend the rest of your life searching for that same beauty again. [sniffs] Yes. Nuclear Swan Elephant: Wow, you're an idiot. Episode 2 Carnival Knowledge [1.2a] Rocko: Hef, we're mates, right? Heffer: Is this about the money I owe you? Rocko: Well- Heffer: Hey! [points] What's going on over at the sewer treatment plant? Rocko: It's a carnival. Heffer: You know for a second there I thought those carny games were rigged. Rocko: Not everyone is out to rip you off. Heffer: You have to learn to trust people. Sand In Your Navel [1.2b] Rocko: Spunky, well, I guess we better find a hose to wash off. [A flock of seagulls floats down and eats the food that Rocko and Spunky are buried in, inadvertently biting them as well.] Rocko: Or maybe just some iodine. Episode 3 Rocko's Happy Sack [1.3a] Filburt: And your total is... [the cash register shows "$1.50"] Rocko: Phew! [Then the total suddenly increases] Filburt: One hundred and fifty dollars. Gee, looks like you just missed a big sale. Have a nice day. Rocko: [snarls and gets bombs in his eyes, enraged and loses it] You CHEAP LITTLE ROTTER! I've been run over by a car, made to drag around a gimp shopping cart, threatened by your Gestapo security guards, had me head set on fire, I was attacked by wild lobsters, beaten by a very large woman, had me dog wrapped in plastic, nearly starved to death, and I still beat the 12:00 deadline! So if you don't change that total back to $1.50, I WILL DO SOMETHING NOT NICE! Flu-In-the-Enza [1.3b] Episode 4 Who's For Dinner? [1.4a] George: Heffer, sit down and talk to me. I'm still your father. Heffer: [sharply and devastated] You're not my father! You're just a jerk in wolf's clothing! [dashes out of the front door, running away, bawling] [The Wolfe family glares annoyingly at Rocko] Rocko: Well, I'm stuffed. [chuckles] Heffer: [upset] I guess no one loves me. [wailing; blows his nose] Love Spanked [1.4b] Episode 5 Clean Lovin [1.5a]==== ====Unbalanced Load [1.5b]==== ===Episode 6=== ====Leap Frogs [1.6a]====Ed Bighead: [gets hit by Cupid's arrow; seductively] Bev...Bev Bighead: Yes, Ed...Ed Bighead: We're almost out of mouthwash. ====Bedfellows [1.6b]==== [Rocko's couch suddenly comes to life to avoid being slept on by Heffer's humungous body; the couch lashes angrily at Heffer]Rocko's Couch: Now listen here, tanker tush! You can park your thunder cheeks in someone else's face 'cause I deserve better than this! [rushes out of the front door] SAY-O-NA-RA, BUTTERBALL! [Ed is spying on Rocko's backyard, where a nudist party is being held]Ed Bighead: Bev! Oh, I can't believe it! Do you know what that weirdo next door is up to?Bev Bighead: Oh, shut up and mind your own business, Ed.Ed Bighead: But, Bev! They're, well... Nude! [Bev grabs the binoculars]Bev Bighead: Oh, Ed! Oh, you're right! Oh, yes! This is disgusting! Quick, Ed, get the telescope out of the hall closet! ===Episode 7=== ====No Pain, No Gain [1.7a]==== ====Who Gives A Buck [1.7b]====Heffer: I couldn't help myself. When I found out you were gonna lose everything, I went out and got the last one!Rocko: Heffer, you're a pal! But wait, you don't have any money. Hey! You didn't use credit, did you?Heffer: Heck, no. Only an idiot would use credit. I used this! [pulls out a card]Rocko: [reading card] "The All Scottish Show Organ Exchange Program"?Heffer: I sold my second stomach for cash! ===Episode 8=== ====Jet Scream [1.8a]====Heffer: Ooh... buttons! [Heffer pushes one button and it ends up freezing Rocko. He pushes another button and it heats Rocko making him sweat. He is about to push another one.]Rocko: Heffer, no, not that one! [Heffer pushes the attendant button and it ends up ejecting the copilot]Rocko: That one must be broken.Captain: No need to be alarmed, we have temporarily lost power to our right engine. [both wings are broken off by mountains] Oops. ====Dirty Dog [1.8b]====Squirmy: Here we are, Mr. Icck. Fried lice fritters!Bloaty: Mmm. Boy, uh, does that look good.Mr. Icck: It better be good, Bloatman, or it's back to the colon mines for you!Bloaty: (nervously) The colon mines. Right, boss.Mr. Icck: You're FIRED! I mean, THE END! ===Episode 9=== ====Keeping Up With the Bigheads [1.9a]====Rocko: That's it! There's only so much a wallaby can take! Not only will this house not be condemned, it will be the most beautiful house in the neighborhood! Even nicer than yours!Ed Bighead: [laughs] Stop! Stop! I might wet myself! [keeps laughing, but then wets himself] Oops. ====Skid Marks [1.9b]==== ===Episode 10=== ====The Good, The Bad and the Wallaby [1.10a]==== ====Trash-O-Madness [1.10b]==== ===Episode 11=== ====Power Trip [1.11a]====Rocko: FILBURT!Filburt: Yes boss?Rocko: I want to see you in my office IMMEDIATELY!Filburt: Yes boss! [uses his teeth to drag himself to the office and he arrives in the office]Rocko: Supply and demand, Filburt; supply and demand. People demand "Big Man" comics, and we supply them. If you, Filburt can't supply "Big Man", the system breaks down. Do you follow me Filburt!?Filburt: Yes sir.Rocko: If the system breaks down, I DON’T MAKE A PROFIT! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?!Filburt: No...? [Rocko turns around and shows Rocko is now the same shape and size Mr. Smitty is and Filburt screams in horror]Rocko: YOU'RE FIRED! [Rocko's breath sends away Filburt down the stairs, out of the shop and into the street. Random vehicles run over Filburt]Filburt: Where are you, Really Really Big Man? ====To Heck and Back [1.11b]====Heffer: Wait a minute. "Heck"? Isn't it supposed to be-Peaches: [covers Heffer's mouth] Censors. ===Episode 12=== ====Spitballs [1.12a]==== ====Popcorn Pandemonium [1.12b]====Trailer Announcer: It's not new. It's not original. It isn't even very interesting. But it is coming this summer.Guy 1: [opening Dracula's casket] All right Dracula. You're in for it now. We're gonna... [does a double take]Trailer Announcer: Dracula, as you've never seen him before: Dead. [Dracula's skeleton has a stake already through his heart]Guy 1: Our work here is finished.Guy 2: Yup yup.Guy 1: Get some bagels?Guy 2: All right.Trailer Announcer''': Dracula: It's been done. To. Death. ===Episode 13=== ====Cabin Fever [1.13a]==== ====Rinse and Spit'' [1.13b] Category:Television show seasons