Zombies on Broadway

Zombies on Broadway is a 1945 film about two bumbling press who agents must search for a zombie to fulfill a commitment to their ex-gangster boss's new nightclub. Directed by Gordon Douglas. Written by Robert E. Kent. Two zanies on a zombie hunt!  taglines Professor Paul Renault There's no need to be afraid; the serum is entirely painless. Oh, you probably saw your friend and you wondered what was wrong with him. There's no harm in telling you now... he's in a state of suspended animation - that is, he is capable of functioning only under thought suggestions not his own. Or more simply... he is a *zombie*. In a few moments, you, too, will be one. Have them dig a couple of graves for themselves, in case the experiment fails. Ace Miller You do not resign and you do not quit and that guy Walker does not make a monk out of me to the tune of eighty grand! Now get this - you either produce a real zombie on opening night, or I take Gus's idea. Dialogue Prof. Hopkins: His name was Dr. Renault, Dr. Paul Renault. Over twenty-five years ago, he went to the only place where zombies were known to exist - on the island of San Sebastian, one of the smaller Virgin Islands, but I haven't heard from him since. Mike Streger: Oh, we don't want to disturb him, do we Jerry? Prof. Hopkins: I don't know if he's alive or dead, but if he's alive, he can tell you what you want to know. Go to San Sebastian - Paul can help you. Jerry Miles: What's this Paul like... if he's alive? Prof. Hopkins: A great scientist. Yes, some people say he is crazy. I don't think he is crazy... well, ah, not very crazy, anyway. Ship's captain: [pointing to a tropical island] San Sebastian. Mike Streger: Is it a nice place? Ship's captain: To an undertaker, a cemetery is a nice place. Jerry Miles: You see, we're doing some research work on zombies, and he said you could help us. Prof. Paul Renault: The fool! I know nothing about zombies. I came here to study a strange coconut blight. Mike Streger: Coconut blight? He said it was a banana blight. Prof. Paul Renault: Oh, Joseph is color blind. Prof. Hopkins: Do you know what zombies are? Mike Streger: No, I don't. Jerry Miles: I'm not too sure. Prof. Hopkins: They are the living dead! Worthington: [Panicking] Oh, me, oh, my! Prof. Hopkins: Worthington, come back here! Worthington: Then please don't say that livin' dead stuff, boss. I'm one of the livin' livin', but you givin' me the feelin' that if I stayed here, I'm goin' to be one of the dead dead. Jerry Miles: Professor, I don't understand it. Professor Hopkins said you made a great study of zombies. Dr. Paul Renault: Professor Hopkins always was strange. Some people say he was crazy, but I don't think he was crazy... not very crazy, anyway. Headwaiter: [at the Café San Sebastian] What are you going to have? Jerry Miles: Uh, I'll have a rum punch. Mike Streger: Uh, I think I'll have something "tripical". Jerry Miles: You mean "tropical". Mike Streger: [holding up 3 fingers] No, I mean "tripical". I'll have a tripical rum punch. I'm thirsty. Gus: I got an idea, boss. Ace Miller: Brother, I need an idea to get out of this jam. Gus: The cops find these two guys' bodies with a note pinned on 'em sayin' they committed suicide on account of they were so ashamed because they couldn't deliver a real zombie. Ace Miller: Hey, that's a possibility! Dr. Paul Renault: Oh, what is wrong, what is wrong? How can the natives do with their silly voodoo what I cannot accomplish by scientific means? Joseph: Perhaps because a zombie is something of the devil, not of science, Professor. Dr. Paul Renault: Nonsense. Nonsense! You have seen what I am able to do; you have seen me create a zombie. If only I could keep them in that state. If only they didn't die; return to normal in a short period... Jean LaDance: Hey, we're lucky! There's a full moon tonight. Listen! Those voodoo drums - that's the death beat you hear. We'll have to hurry. Jerry Miles: Wait a minute. How will we know a zombie if we see one? Jean LaDance: If you see a corpse walking around... that's a zombie. Joseph: It seems a waste to make a beautiful girl a zombie. Dr. Paul Renault: She'll be just as nice to look at... and if this formula works, her beauty will be preserved indefinitely. Mike Streger: I guess I better think of something, huh? Jerry Miles: No! That's what caused all the trouble before. You had to think of a zombie? You couldn't say a two-headed boy or an African pinhead? Mike Streger: Where could you get those? Jerry Miles: Well, a pinhead would have been easy. I don't know where to start lookin' for a zombie. Taglines Two zanies on a zombie hunt! Hee! Hee! What ghoulish glee! They're STALKING WALKING DEAD MEN... and it's a SCREAM! Cast Wally Brown — Jerry Miles Alan Carney — Mike Strager Bela Lugosi — Professor Paul Renault Anne Jeffreys — Jean La Danse Sheldon Leonard — Ace Miller Frank Jenks — Gus Russell Hopton — Benny Joseph Vitale — Joseph Ian Wolfe — Prof. Hopkins Louis Jean Heydt — Douglas Walker Darby Jones — Kalaga — the Zombie Robert Clarke — Wimpy Rosemary La Planche — Entertainer in Sarong Sir Lancelot — Calypso Singer Jason Robards Sr. — Headwaiter Nick Stewart — Worthington Bill Williams — Smuggler sailor Emory Parnell — Ship's Captain External links 0038270 Zombies on Broadway Category:1945 American films Category:Comedy horror films Category:Zombie comedy films Category:Films about mad scientists Category:Films set in the Caribbean Category:Films directed by Gordon Douglas Category:1945 English-language films