Rick and Morty (season 8)

Seasons: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 | Main Rick and Morty (2013–present) is an American adult animated science-fiction sitcom created by Justin Roiland and Dan Harmon for Adult Swim. The series follows the misadventures of the cynical mad scientist, Rick Sanchez, and his fretful and easily influenced grandson, Morty Smith, who split their time between domestic family life and interdimensional adventures. Summer of All Fears [8.01] Rick: Listen, if this is about the beers, Morty's cool. He has, like, four Purple Hearts. Morty: Five. Those and a nickel will get you a cup of coffee. Rick: Ho-ho! Disillusioned Morty! Love this guy! Morty: Come into the wolf's house and piss in its bed, you're gonna get bit! That's just the nature of the wolf! That's just the nature of the wolf! Summer: I know you lost a brother in there. Don't make me lose you. Morty: It's like the pain is all I have left of him! But-- But he's gone! He never existed in the first place! Summer: Don't say that! Without you and your friends, we never would've escaped the Matrix! Morty: Rick! He-- He would've woken up and let us out! Summer: On whose terms?! He would've wiped us clean before our eyes were open, and then they'd really be gone! All of them! CJ. Chaplock... Marmaduke, um... Morty: 8-Ball! Jesus! Summer: I-- I'm... I'm sorry, Morty. You get to decide now. What do you wanna do? Morty: I wanna go home. Summer: Yeah. Let's go home. Valkyrick [8.02] Rick: It was a good rescue, though. Space Beth: You got me fired! Rick: Only because you blew your chance to quit! Rick: Step one — we blend in as bugs working for the Department of Transportation. My guy Cisco will be at the back door at 7:00 a.m. Space Beth: Who's Cisco? Rick: My inside man. Don't worry. Space Beth: Okay, but what if he doesn't show up? Rick: What's that supposed to mean? You don't even know Cisco. Space Beth: Which is very concerning since this plan seems very dependent on him. Rick: So let me finish the plan. Space Beth: Fine. Rick: Step two — Cisco provides us with security credentials for the maintenance tunnels. Space Beth: And if he doesn't show, what's our backup plan? Rick: I use Cisco so that I don't need a backup plan. [...] Rick: Step three — we quickly and quietly patch into the surveillance grid. Space Beth: Wait. How 'd we get there? Rick: With the credentials we got from Cisco. Space Beth: So in other words, if Cisco-- Rick: Cisco has never not shown up! Space Beth: Can I just ask, what does someone have to do to achieve the level of trust you place in this random man? Rick: I trust plenty of people. Space Beth: Name two. Rick: Uh, easy — Birdperson and Cisco. Space Beth: Cisco's at the same level as Birdperson?! The Rick, The Mort & The Ugly [8.03] [Homesteader Rick discovers the Arcade and Doc Mortys hiding in his cruiser] Homesteader Rick: What the FUCK?! Doc Morty: I-I-It was his idea! Don't hurt us, I'm not a real doctor! Homesteader Rick: What are you doing here?! Get the fuck outta my car! Arcade Morty: We're coming with you to rescue our friends. Homesteader Rick: I'm not going to rescue your friends – I'm going to kill those guys who stole my shit! Arcade Morty: Yeah, exactly. It's the same guys. Doc Morty: [nodding] It is the same guys... Arcade Morty: Flush us into space or keep driving. Homesteader Rick: Fuckin' Mortys...! Big Rick: Well, now! My associates here tell me you rustled up quite the score! Oddjob, your, uh, normal job, please. [His butler, Oddjob Rick, leaves] Big Rick: I can monologue while we wait. You ever wonder why I'm an overweight Southern railroad baron? See, I was cloned to be the mascot of a Citadel gumbo chain. "Get yo' mouth round it!" But Big Rick's Gumbo Hutch is trash now. Whole Citadel is trash now. And there ain't no peckin' order amongst the trash. Trafficker Rick: What a utopia. Big Rick: It will be, once I have the requisite Mortys. We can all be kings here, Mr. Trafficker! [Oddjob Rick returns and passes Trafficker Rick his payment] Trafficker Rick: Good luck with that. [leaves] Big Rick: Don't go spendin' it all in one place, y'all! [to Oddjob Rick] Filthy degenerate. No accent at all. Big Rick: You certainly are a bur in my saddle. Homesteader Rick: You're a joke. Big Rick: I'm whatever I wanna be! That's the freedom of life as a clone! You wouldn't know – someone made you with sex! All those sweaty parts and nibbly bits! You disgust me! Homesteader Rick: [laughs and coughs] It's over, man... your dream's about to be gumbo. "Get... yo' mouth round it." Big Rick: You know me? F-F... Father?! Homesteader Rick: Oh! [chuckles] Oh, no, no. Y-You're under the delusion of something called the auteur myth. Truth is, any big project is made in collaboration. Lots of delegating. I sort of... gave notes. Big Rick: I don't wanna hear this! Homesteader Rick: Good news... you don't have to. Au revoir, son. [activates a detonator] Big Rick: You WRETCH! [The new Citadel is blown up, along with them both] The Last Temptation of Jerry [8.04] Jerry: Doesn't anyone celebrate Easter anymore? I-I don't wanna force people to go to church or anything, but-- Beth: Can you even tell me what Easter is about? Jerry: It's when Christ was born. Or... was murdered, maybe, I don't know. But we eat candy to remember. It's important! Rick: Jerry, if it wasn't for the aisle at Costco, you wouldn't even know it was happening. Morty: Yeah, Dad. Example: when's Christmas? Jerry: December 25th. Morty: And what's today's date? Jerry: I... A-- Ap-- April! Cryo Mort a Rickver [8.05] Woman on Radio: You're about to learn the tragic fate of the Oak Point High lacrosse team, but this podcast won't cash in on their specific and particularly gruesome group decapitation. Rick: [turns off the radio] Too bad. Someone else will. Morty: It's a big market, man. Rick: Morty, don't just respond, find a podcast without scruples. Ship AI: Cryoship detected. Rick: Ooh, power's still online? [belches] What do you think, Morty? A bunch of sleeping beauties - wanna go tap on some glass? Morty: Err, that could be fun! W-We haven't done one of those in a while. Man on Radio: Welcome to Bloodbath, the podcast that's only grisly details! Rick: [belches again] Now we're talking! The CuRicksous Case of Bethjamin Button [8.06] Dr. Dogballs: All Earth theme parks end the same way! Jurassic Park, Westworld – even the rides inside the theme parks tell the same story! You're on a boat ride when suddenly, you take a detour to a waterfall, and now you're in a pirate's den, forced to suck dick to stay alive! [cackles madly] Summer: Why would you do this?! Dr. Dogballs: The greatest tribute to Earth is a theme park that ends in CHAOS! [He activates a signal that causes all the Earth World mascots to start attacking and devouring the guests] Alien Girl: [kissing Morty] Ooooh, say something racist! Morty: What?! Alien Girl: Come on! You're human, it's your whole thing. Morty: Uh... Italians make... pretty... pretty good pizza? Alien Girl: No, do it hateful, you disgusting little bug. Morty: [hearing the destruction outside] Uh... did you hear that? Alien Girl: Now you're pretending there's some kind of emergency?! I tried to be vulnerable with you! If you don't think I'm pretty, just say so. Morty: [pushing her away] I'm sorry, but I-I'm not some sexual fantasy. I'm a whole person! Alien Girl: Come on! You guys basically invented racism! If I wanted to fuck something good, I wouldn't have come to Earth World! Ricker than Fiction [8.07] Nomortland [8.08] Morty Daddy [8.09] Hot Rick [8.10] Jerry: Why are we dunking on Rick? He's been a loving dad to our family for as long as I can remember. Beth: Excuse me? Jerry: Remember him at our wedding and Morty's birth? And that time he invented PB&J. Rick's great. Rick: What? Memory Rick and Beth: Mom is trapped in a box in the sub-basement. I'm the only one who can save her. This is how we stay a family. Memory Diane: Now what?! Memory Rick: I-- I don't know! This is as far as I've planned! I-- I've never actually had to be a parent! Memory Diane: Should we go back? Memory Rick: Rick hates me and he pulled you out of his head. He'll just kill us! Beth: Well, if there's no way out, should we just Thelma and Lousie this? Memory Diane and Rick: Wait, what?! [Beth crashes through a guardrail and drives towards the edge of a cliff.] Memory Rick: Beth, you're real! Don't do this! Memory Diane: Honey, we'll be fine! Beth: I can't live without you! Memory Rick: Honey, please! Beth: This! Is how! We stay! A family! Memory Rick: Beth, no! Memory Diane: Wait! If this is a recent memory, doesn't that mean she already--? [Immediate cut to Beth's car mid-air.] Beth: I'm so confused, Space Beth! I hear-- I hear so many voices! I remember loving my Dad and then hating my Dad...! Rick: That's just called being alive, sweetie. I wasn't there for you, and someone took advantage of that. But I'm here now. Your real dad is here, Beth, and he's more emotionally open. [Beth breaks down and hugs Rick, who reciprocates.] Teen Beth: He seems nice. Hoodie Beth: Why didn't we get that version of Dad? Category:Rick and Morty seasons Category:American animated television seasons