Shrek the Halls

Shrek the Halls is a Christmas special that premiered on November 28th 2007. Shrek I have to make a Christmas, and I have no idea what it is or how to do it. The tree goes inside the house? [turns to Gingy] Excuse you for what? Oh, Puss, not you too. Alright, everybody, if you leave now, you can beat the holiday traffic! So, despite the fact that you drive me crazy at times,-- Yes, Donkey, I'm looking at you. --it would mean a lot to me if you'd all come back and join us. Smelly Christmas to all, and to all a gross night! Donkey Merry Christmas, Shrek! How are you gonna have Christmas without your family? My mom used to always say: "Christmas ain't Christmas till somebody cries". Usually, that someone's me [sniffles] [laughs] They got you good, Shrek! [snow dumps on him] Hey! That wasn't even funny. Who did that? Princess Fiona This is gonna be the best Christmas ever. And we're going to do it together, so come on. [pulls Shrek's arm] They're our friends, Shrek. They all mean well. I have to go. I need to apologize to our friends. [walks away with the babies in her arms] Puss in Boots Okay, I will assume the position. [gets himself tortured by the ogre babies] In my homeland, we tell a very different tale of the Santa Nicholas. He's not made of waffles. I have shamed myself. [jumps off the chair] Boss, there's no right way to do Christmas, you just do it. Gingy [talking to an angel-shaped cookie] Did you hurt yourself when you fell out of heaven? Aw, phooey with all your sunshine and lollipops! Where I come from, Christmas is a nightmare! ...until they got home, when they looked at the car door handle and they found...A HOOK! Stop, drop, and roll, Shrek! Santa?! AAAAAAHH!!! [slams the door] Others Pinocchio: C'mon, everybody, let's DANCE! Big Bad Wolf: Apology accepted. Let's go eat. 3 Little Pigs: Ja, with schnitzel. Dialogue Gingy: Excuse me. Excuse me! Shrek: Excuse you for what? Gingy: I don't feel very good. [pukes a chocolate chip] Ah, I feel better now. [runs away] Donkey: Ooh, a chocolate chip! [eats off the floor] Mm! Gingy: 'Twas the night before Christmas, and the prettiest sights were my sweetheart beside me in the bright Christmas lights. [his story unfolds] ...until they got home, when they looked at the car door handle and they found...A HOOK! [Suzie shrieks and he laughs] Suzie: [her first words] Gingy, cut it out! You're really givin' me the creeps! Gingy: Oh, come on, I was just teasin'. Come here, you. Suzie: [giggles] Oh, Gingy, I couldn't stay mad at you. Gingy: [hears rustling noise] What was that? Suzie: Oh, no, you don't. I'm not fallin' for that again. Gingy: No, I'm really, really seriously not kidding. [turns on headlights and sees a giant Santa Claus] Whoa! Suzie: [her last words] Oh, Gingy! [Santa makes Godzilla shriek, Gingy and Suzie panic as Santa reaches out and grabs Suzie] Gingy: Oh! Suzie! [watches Suzie getting devoured] No! NO! NOOOOOO!!! Donkey: [cuts off Gingy's story] That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! Now, you know that's not how it goes! Gingy: You weren't there! Shrek: Alright, everyone, I've had just about enough. All I wanted was a nice Christmas, with MY family! Donkey: And that's exactly why we're all here! Now, come on, let's finish telling my story! Shrek: Oh, no, Donkey, that's not what I meant. And get out of my chair! [Accidentally drops Christmas for Village Idiots.] Donkey: Hey, what's this? Shrek: Donkey! Let go of the book! Donkey: Why are you whispering? Shrek: I'm not kidding Donkey, GIVE ME THE BOOK!!! [Accidentally throws Christmas for Village Idiots.] [Shrek kicks everyone out after his house gets trashed.] Shrek: OUT! I want everybody out of my house, RIGHT NOW! Donkey: [screams as he's thrown out the door] Yeah, well, that's a real nice way to treat your guests on Christmas! And if you think I am gonna give you a present now, you are SADLY mistaken! Shrek: You want to give me a present? Then go away! That's all I wanted! Donkey: Fine! I'm going! Shrek: Good! Then go! Donkey: You go and have yourself a Merry Christmas! [runs away then comes back] Ebenezer Shrek! [runs away again] Shrek: And a "bah, humbug" to you, too! Donkey: I don't understand why Shrek had to be so mean and cranky. We were tryin' what you wanted us to do. Fiona: What're you talking about? Donkey: What you said this morning. You and Shrek wanted to have a big, noisy family Christmas. Fiona: No, I said it was our first Christmas together as a family. Donkey: Right. That's me and everybody else. Then he lost his temper like that. Fiona: You know, Donkey, none of us really asked Shrek what he wanted. Puss in Boots: I must agree with the Princess. [to Donkey] And you, were no Christmas angel. Donkey: I don't remember askin' you anything! Fiona: Donkey. Donkey: I'm sorry, Princess. You're right. Even still, Shrek didn't have to be so... Shrek: What? [Donkey screaming and Puss shrieking] Pigheaded? Stubborn? Mean? Well, maybe I am all those things, but I'm an ogre, OK? So here's the thing. I'm sorry you took getting kicked out of my house the wrong way. No, wait. What I meant to say is I know you're just trying to be helpful in your irritating fashion... Puss in Boots: Ay, caramba! Shrek: Some people can't help being annoying. Fiona: Shrek! Shrek: Look, I shouldn't have lost my temper back there. Wolf: Apology accepted. Let's eat. Donkey: Wait a minute. There's somethin' more to this. Come on, what's goin' on? Shrek: Look, all I wanted was to make this perfect for my family, but I don't even know what Christmas means. The thing is, this is my first Christmas too. Donkey: Hold up, Shrek! You mean that you never had... Shrek: No. Puss in Boots: Not even one? Shrek: No! Donkey: You mean no chestnuts, no Santa, no presents, no stockings? No nut cakes?! Shrek: Donkey! No, none of that. Ogres don't celebrate Christmas. Ogres don't celebrate anything. Donkey: Oh, man, now I'm all emotional. Come here, gimme a hug! Shrek: All right, that's close enough. Donkey: OK, all right, I just... guess I got... a little excited about Christmas and all the presents and mistletoe and everything, and I forgot that it's... It's about us all bein' together, and I'm... I'm sorry, Shrek. Shrek: I know, Donkey, and... and I'm sorry it ended up in a great big fight. Donkey: Christmas is all about big fights. My mama used to say, "Christmas ain't Christmas till somebody cries." Usually that someone's me. Puss in Boots: There is no right way to do Christmas. You just do it. Pigs: Ja, with schnitzel! Pinocchio: And eggnog! Mices: And cheese! Fiona: And family. Shrek: Yeah. And family. So despite the fact that you drive me crazy at times... Yes, Donkey, I'm lookin' at you, it would mean a lot to me if you'd all come back and join us. Cast Mike Myers as Shrek Eddie Murphy as Donkey Cameron Diaz as Princess Fiona Antonio Banderas as Puss in Boots Conrad Vernon as Gingy Cody Cameron as Pinocchio and Three Little Pigs Aron Warner as Big Bad Wolf Christopher Knights as Three Blind Mice Miles Christopher Bakshi, Nina Zoe Bakshi, and Dante James Hauser as Farkle, Fergus, & Felicia Marissa Jaret Winokur as Bookstore Clerk Gary Trousdale as Santa Claus External links Category:Shrek Category:Animated Christmas TV specials