Stiff Upper Lips

Stiff Upper Lips is a 1998 British comedy film that spoofs Merchant-Ivory films. Aunt Agnes tries to force Emily to marry boring Cedric Trilling by taking her to Italy and India in the hope that she will forget about handsome George. Directed by Gary Sinyor. Written by Paul Simpkin and Gary Sinyor. I want my sexual awakening and I want it now! (taglines) Horace Time to spread the British Empire. I wish that Cedric was more like you. He is such a queer fellow and you're always... so gay. Ten years, plus two for having pleaded not guilty, making thirteen years in all. Cedric [writing in his diary, recording his first impressions of Emily] There is something about her slim, elegant figure that rather reminds me of Edward....hmmmmmm. Miss Ivory, having carefully considered the advantages and disadvantages, I feel it is my duty to ask you to become my wife so that no man may say a Trilling child might be a bastard. Emily Ivory I'm a beautiful, young virgin in Italy. I want my sexual awakening and I want it now! Oh, Aunt Agnes, just remember: you are not losing a niece, you are gaining a man who is... awfully good at croquet and who can probably greet the wedding guests in Greek, Latin... and hieroglyphics. Dialogue [Edward and Cedric disembark from a train; the conductor asks them for their tickets. They both ignore him.] Edward: I do so hate ordinary people. Cedric: You mustn't hate them; they have smaller brains. Cedric: Do you make an effort to be stupid or does it come naturally? Edward: Are those the only two choices? Aunt Agnes: Emily, do laugh at Mr. Trilling's witticism. Emily: Certainly. The moment he makes one. Emily: Who are you? George: My name's George. Emily: George... you have a ripping set of unmentionables! Edward: What did he say? Cedric: [translating, consulting a dictionary] She's mine, I'll have her. And then the other one said: No, I want... I want to pierce, or otherwise penetrate, her. Hudson: Where will you go? Rosie: My nanna has kindly invited me to London town to stay with her and be a prostitute. Hudson: You are indeed fortunate to have such an understanding family. Rosie: If you're ever passin', do pop in. Like her and me Mam and me sister, I hope to bear many illegitimate children into abject poverty. [Hudson is the last servant left, and everyone else has been fired] Servant Girl: Can you manage on your own? Hudson: [proudly] I am a Hudson. Servant Girl: Do you never get bitter? [Hudson doesn't reply, but stands there looking inscrutable; then several bells summoning service begin to ring, and his upper lip trembles slightly.] Servant Girl [awed]: Never? [She leaves. Hudson takes the soup pot and urinates in it] [Emily and Cedric sit at an outdoor table having tea and discussing their impending marriage.] Emily: Soon we will be man and wife. Cedric: [pompously] Or, as the poet Homer says... [Emily grabs a butter knife and stabs Cedric in the skull with it. Emily then awakes from her nightmare.] Taglines I want my sexual awakening and I want it now! Cast Peter Ustinov - Horace Prunella Scales - Aunt Agnes Georgina Cates - Emily Samuel West - Edward Robert Portal- Cedric Sean Pertwee - George External links 0120210 Stiff Upper Lips Category:1998 films Category:Comedy films Category:British films Category:Parody films Category:LGBT-related films Category:Films set in England Category:Films set in India Category:Films set in Italy