Going Bongo

Going Bongo is a 2015 comedy drama film directed by Dean Matthew Ronalds and produced by Brian Ronalds. Going Bongo star Ernest Napoleon and features Emanuela Galliussi, Nyokabi Gethaiga and Ashley Olds. 2015-07-08 Quotes 1. You touch her, I cut off your balls! MARINA: He also asked me to marry him. MA: But he is not Armenian. AUNT TIA: What is he? LEWIS: American AUNT TIA: But he has a funny accent. LEWIS: Well, I was raised by- POP: You think you can marry my daughter and no asking? MARINA: Ask LEWIS: Now? LEWIS: Mr. Kezerian, may I-- POP: You touch her, I cut off your balls! 2. I’m already half black, half white. I got no more halves. LEWIS: Do we have to honeymoon in Armenia? MARINA: I know, I know. you want your beach. LEWIS: I’ve been trapped in hospitals for the last ten years with almost no days off and no sunlight. MARINA: There’s a lake. LEWIS: Its not the same thing. MARINA: Look, I need you to meet me half way. LEWIS: By "half way" you mean Armenia? MARINA: We’ll do the beach vacation later. I need you to be half "Armo" for them. LEWIS: I’m already half black, half white. I got no more halves. 3. It is what locals call Dar. It means you must have good brains and intelligence or you will not survive. TENDE: And Dr. Yaziti is lending for you this baiskeli. I leave it for you outside. The hospitali is five minutes in this direction. Welcome to Bongo City. LEWIS: Bongo City? TENDE: It is what locals call Dar. It means you must have good brains and intelligence or you will not survive. 4. Dark skinned men look good in white. MARINA: Next time you rent a suit, I’m going with you. LEWIS: Dark skinned men look good in white. MARINA: Apparently waiters also look good in white. 5. Dr.Booger BAHAME: Dr.Booger LEWIS: Burger BAHAME: That’s what I said. LEWIS: You said Booger. It’s "Burrrrger". Like "Hamburger". BAHAME: Ham-booger. LEWIS: Dr. B’s fine. BAHAME So when are you leaving us? LEWIS: One month. BAHAME: You are here for only one month? 6. It requires a lot of carefulness to kill the fly that perches on the scrotum. LEWIS: How much does Rama make? BAHAME: This is not your concern. LEWIS: If you paid him more, that generator would be fixed. BAHAME: Do not tell me how to do my job. LEWIS: Hear me out. A staff that feels valued, works harder. They work harder, you SAVE money. BAHAME: Listen, "It requires a lot of carefulness to kill the fly that perches on the scrotum." 7. You can’t solve them all. But you can change one problem at a time LAURA: How is everything else going? LEWIS: It’s going good. LEWIS: Well, I have this patient named Zola. Its hard enough that she’s got HIV ... and her mom is just very difficult LAURA: I heard. I am think deep inside she’s just concerned about her daughter LEWIS: Yah but ... for such a young girl to contract HIV, its just ... And her mom is just ... And I saw the boy in the wheelchair again today.... LAURA: I went through the exactly same experience when I was new here. LEWIS: There are just too many problems. It feels that I can’t even begin to dream that I can solve half of them. LAURA: You can’t solve them all. But you can change one problem at a time. 8. All I can think about is Africa. LEWIS: Marina, there’s something-- MARINA: Here. Sit next to Brian. She plops Lewis next to Brian, then sits by Gwen. BRIAN: Gwen and I are gonna bid on lot four, what do you think? PERRY WEISS: Thank you, thank you. Hello friends. I’m Perry Weiss and welcome to our quarterly fundraiser. AUCTIONEER (O.S.) : Our programs are ninety nine percent privately funded which means your support is vital. MARINA: Lewis? What are you doing over here? LEWIS: I don’t want this. This job. These people. MARINA: What are you talking about? LEWIS: All I can think about is Africa. 9. I’ve been trapped in hospitals for the last ten years with almost no days off and no sunlight. LEWIS: I think that went well. Your father only threatened to cut my balls off once. MARINA: I can’t wait to move outta there. LEWIS: Do we have to honeymoon in Armenia? MARINA: I know, I know. you want your beach. LEWIS: I’ve been trapped in hospitals for the last ten years with almost no days off and no sunlight. 10. Before you swallow a mango seed, you must know the size of your anus LEWIS: I understand you’re overcrowded, you don’t have supplies. But really that doesn’t explain your staff. Who trained them, the three stooges? BAHAME: Do you think there are lines of nurses and doctors waiting to work here? LEWIS: You need retrain your staff. BAHAME: With what money? I can barely keep my doors open. People wait days here to get a bed. They need help and we must give it to them anyway we can. LEWIS: Fine. I’ll do it. BAHAME: For one month? If you want to stay the situation then stay longer. LEWIS: I can’t do that. BAHAME: Then, there is nothing more. LEWIS: So, what? That’s it! BAHAME: Listen."Before you swallow a mango seed, you must know the size of your anus." Think about it. 11. You mean, I’ve been haggling the price HIGHER?! WALLET VENDOR: Elfu tano na tano (15 thousands) LEWIS: Ghali! (more expensive) WALLET VENDOR: Ishirini (20) LEWIS: Ghali! (more expensive) WALLET VENDOR: Ishirini na tano (25) LEWIS: Ghali! (more expensive) WALLET VENDOR: Thelathini (30) LEWIS: Tende! LEWIS: Tende, look how well I’m doing TENDE: No no no! Ghali means "expensive". Rahisi means "cheap". LEWIS: You mean, I’ve been haggling the price HIGHER?! 12. I was born to do this LEWIS: Don’t you think that’s crazy. LAURA: It is LEWIS: What would you do? LAURA: About what? mgangas? What can you do. You just accept that others may not share your view on modern medicine. LEWIS: ... What if the "mganga" was to prescribe them modern medicine. LAURA: They would take them. But of course, that would never happen not. LEWIS: So if I can get a mganga ... LAURA: You are crazy. You are not really thinking of doing this ... you are thinking of doing this ... how are you going to convince a "professional mganga" to give her real medicine. LEWIS: I wasn’t thinking of a real mganga. … LEWIS: This is our last chance to save Zola. You know what to do. LEWIS :Are you sure you can do this? (to Tina) 
 TINA: I was born to do this. My mask please. 13. The only reason I came over here was to impress some big-wig surgeons. LAURA: Listen, there’s a bus leaving for Arusha in the morning. Go on a safari. You need to see the beauty of this country. LEWIS: What’s that gonna do? LAURA: Take some time for yourself. LEWIS :You have no idea what I need. The only reason I came over here was to impress some big-wig surgeons. LAURA: I don’t believe this. LEWIS: It’s true. 14. Not as great as landing one Owen Wilson DR. LERNER: My niece is trying to convince me she needs the new Ferrari more than I do. MARVIN: She sounds like my daughter. LEWIS: Dr. Lerner. I wanted to thank you. It was such an incredible experience. DR. LERNER: Do I know you? LEWIS: I’m Dr. Burger. We met at the Perry Weiss fundraiser. I went to Tanzania. DR. LERNER: Perry Weiss. Can you believe my wife has roped us into another one of those things? MARVIN: It’s great publicity for the clinic. DR. LERNER: Not as great as landing one Owen Wilson. 15. Are you an actress? I am an actress too. I have a movie on YouTube. MARINA: I need a phone. Do you have a phone? Excuse me, phone? Phone? LEWIS: Marina???
 MARINA: Lewis? Lewis! Oh my God! This is YOUR hospital? Oh Baby, its so good to see you LEWIS: What are you doing here?! MARINA: A bus "thing" hit my cab. TINA: Please, Misses. Lie on this. TINA: Are you an actress? I am an actress too. I have a movie on YouTube. 16. Yah, its amazing what persistence can do sometimes. You can even save someone’s life. LAURA: Thank you. LEWIS: That was incredible experience. I have never done anything like that. LAURA: Did you see how much it meant to the mother. LEWIS: It was pretty amazing. LAURA: Yah, its amazing what persistence can do sometimes. You can even save someone’s life. 17. Nice, you beat 26 doctors in the face MARINA: Listen up. I have an announcement. MARINA: Lewis got a job offer. Doctors of Bel Air have asked him to join the clinic. MA: Bel Air? LEWIS: Well technically, Ma’am, it’s L.A. MARINA: He beat out thirty other doctors. LEWIS: Twenty six. UNCLE HOVAN: Nice, you beat 26 doctors in the Face. 18. You can make us a fool but you can’t take our humanity TINA: Hellow, I am Njambi mambi’s assistant. TINA: Now ... Njambi Mambi will break the curse by breaking the sticks. TINA: Njambi Mambi was afraid of this. A stronger curse is needed. TINA: Pull, till it breaks. TINA: Njambi Mambi has broken the curse! ZOLA: And, now for the treatment. The crushed bones of baby baboon. ZOLA: Take two spoonfuls a day. LEWIS: Let’s dance. MAMA MWANDENGA: What is going on! MAMA MWANDENGA: I’m telling you this, I am cursing you all. I am cursing you all! ZOLA: You can make us a fool but you can’t take our humanity 19. I thought if they were appreciated, they’d work harder. LEWIS: Juma, what’s going on? Where is everyone? 
 YAZITI: At the bar celebrating their new salaries. LEWIS: What?! What bar? Where? YAZITI: It will do no good to get them. They are already drunk. LEWIS: They should be fired! YAZITI :But you just gave them raises. LEWIS: I thought if they were appreciated, they’d work harder. 20. Don’t fly Turkish Airways. Go with Camel MA: When are you planning this "supposed" wedding? MARINA: Spring. LEWIS: Spring? MARINA: Spring. UNCLE HOVAN: Oh! Spring! Great time for honeymoon in Armenia. LEWIS: Actually, we were thinking of going some place tropical- MARINA: Armenia’s perfect. UNCLE HOVAN: Don’t fly Turkish Airways. Go with Camel. External links Category:Comedy films Category:2015 films Category:Drama films