Jennifer's Body

thumb| Hell is a teenage girl. Jennifer's Body is a 2009 black comedy-horror film about a demonically possessed high school girl who kills her male classmates, with her best friend striving to stop her. Directed by Karyn Kusama. Written by Diablo Cody. She's evil... and not just high school evil. taglines Needy Lesnicky thumb|I don't even know who Needy Lesnicky is anymore. I'm a different person now. A person who uses curse words and kicks orderlies and sees things that aren't there. A very bad, very damaged person. But sometimes change can be good. For instance, most occult scholars don't know this, but if you're bitten by a demon, and you live, you just might absorb some of the demon's abilities. You might get lucky for once in your miserable life. Hell is a teenage girl. Every day I get letters. I think I get more letters than Santa Claus, Zac Efron and Dr. Phil combined. I'm kinda the shit. Sometimes, the letters are from people who say they're praying for me.They tell me everything will be okay if I just accept Jesus Christ into my heart. I say the words, but nothing ever happens. Nobody comes back. Nobody gets offthe cross. Welcome to the Mental Olympics. They're big on recreation here. Supposedly, it helps us vent our aggressions. Oh, yeah! Personally, I think they're trying to wear us out, keep us sluggish so there won't be an uprising. Well, those J.V. tactics won't work against me. I'm a kicker. K-I-C-K-E-R. It even says so on my chart. I wasn't always this cracked. I used to be normal. Well, as normal as any girl under the influence ofteenage hormones. But after the killings began, I started to feel—I don't know-loose around the edges or something. This is where it all went down. "Devil's Kettle" sounds twisted, I know, but the place is just named after a waterfall. Technically, it's not a normal waterfall. It goes into this hole, and it doesn't come out. The scientist guys dropped all kinds ofthings down there, but nothing ever surfaces. Maybe it's another dimension. Or, you know, just really deep. Jennifer didn't always look this rough. Just two months ago, me, Jennifer and my boyfriend, Chip, were completely normal people. We were our yearbook pictures. Nothing more, nothing less. There's Jennifer. Only back then, we were tight. Sisters, practically. People found it hard to believe that a babe like Jennifer...would associate with a dork like me. Sandbox love never dies. You know what? You were never really a good friend. Even when we were little, you used to steal my toys and pour lemonade on my bed. Why do you need him? Huh? You can have anybody that you want, Jennifer. So why Chip? Is it just to tick me off, or is it just because you're just really insecure? I don't even know who Needy Lesnicky is anymore. I'm a different person now. A person who uses curse words and kicks orderlies and sees things that aren't there. A very bad, very damaged person... [lifts her top sleeve, revealing Jennifer's bite mark imprinted on her shoulder] But sometimes change can be good! For instance, most occult scholars don't know this, but if you're bitten by a demon, and you live, you just might absorb some of the demon's abilities... You might get lucky for once in your miserable life! [she floats up, kicks out the window and escapes] Jennifer Check PMS isn't real Needy, it was invented by the boy-run media to make us seem like we're crazy. God, Do you have to undermine everything I do? You are such a player hater! [Grabs Needy's breasts] These are like smart bombs, you point them in the right direction and shoot gets real. Yeah, right. I'm not even a backdoor-virgin anymore, thanks to Roman. By the way, that hurts. I couldn't even go to flags the next day. I had to stay home and sit on a bag of frozen peas I am not insecure, Needy. God... that's a joke. How could I ever be insecure? I was the Snowflake Queen. Nice insult, Hannah Montana. You got any more harsh digs? Nikolai Wolf thumb|Satan is our only hope. We're in league with the Beast now. And we've got to make a really big impression on him. And to do that, we're going to have to butcher you. And bleed you. And then Dirk here is going to wear your face. Relax, I'm kidding about the face thing. The rest is going to happen. Do you know how hard it is to make it as an indie band these days? There are so many of us, and we're all so cute and it's like if you don't get on Letterman or some retarded soundtrack, you're screwed, okay? Satan is our only hope. We're in league with the Beast now. And we've got to make a really big impression on him. And to do that, we're going to have to butcher you. And bleed you. And then Dirk here is going to wear your face. [Dirk gives him a look] Relax, I'm kidding about the face thing. The rest is going to happen. Other Chip Dove: Needy, I care about you. As a person, not just some girl I made love to for four minutes the other night, and I'm scared of what's happening to you. Chastity: It's true. It's on the Wikipedia. Needy's Mom: [to Needy] I dreamed some bad people were trying to nail you to a tree with hammers and big stakes and shit. Just like J.C. But I didn't let 'em get to you, 'cause I'm a hard-sassed, Ford-tough mama bear. Jonas' Dad: YOU HEAR ME, YOU BASTARD?! I'LL CUT OFF YOUR NUTSACK AND NAIL IT TO MY DOOR!!! LIKE ONE OF THOSE LION DOOR KNOCKERS RICH FOLKS GOT! THAT WILL BE YOUR BALLS! Dialogue thumb|I need you hopeless. thumb|These things, these are like smart bombs. Okay? You point them in the right direction, and shit gets real. Needy: How are you going to get alcohol? Jennifer: I'll just play Hello Titty with the bartender. Jennifer: I think the singer wants me. Needy: Only because he thinks you're a virgin. I heard them talking. Jennifer: Yeah, right. I'm not even a backdoor virgin anymore, thanks to Roman. By the way, that hurts. I couldn't even go to flags the next day. I had to stay home and sit on a bag of frozen peas. Needy: [after Colin asks Jennifer out] Colin's really nice. Jennifer: He listens to maggot rock. He wears nail polish. My dick is bigger than his. Jennifer: [Needy and Chip come downstairs from her bedroom] Hey, Chip. It smells like Thai food in here... Have you guys been fucking? Needy: Ugh, you're gross! Needy: Are you PMS'ing or something? Jennifer: PMS isn't real Needy, it was invented by the boy-run media to make us seem like we're crazy. Needy: Jennifer's evil. Chip: I know. Needy: No. I mean, she's actually evil. Not high school evil. Chip: [after Jennifer attacked him] She can fly? Needy: She's just hovering... it's not that impressive. Jennifer: God, do you have to undermine everything I do? You are such a player hater. Needy: You're a jerk. Jennifer: Nice insult, Hannah Montana. Got any more harsh digs? Needy: You know what? You were never a good friend. Even when we were little you used to steal my toys, and pour lemonade on my bed. Jennifer: And now I'm eating your boyfriend. See? At least I'm consistent. Needy: Why do you need him? Huh? you can have anybody that you want, Jennifer. So... why Chip? Is it just to tick me off? Or is it just because you're just really insecure? Jennifer: I am not insecure, Needy. God, that was a joke, how could I ever be insecure? I was the Snowflake Queen! Needy: Yeah, two years ago when you were socially relevant. Jennifer: I am still socially relevant. Needy: And when you didn't need laxatives to stay skinny. Jennifer: I am going... to eat your soul... and SPIT IT OUT, LESNICKI! Needy: I thought you only murdered boys. Jennifer: [smirks] I go both ways. Needy: (gets the idea) Wait a second... You got my last name right! I knew you would! Needy: Best friends FOREVER, huh? You killed my best boyfriend! You goddamned monster, you dumb BITCH! [Jennifer bites Needy on the arm. Needy reveals her knife] Needy: Ya know what THIS is for? Huh? It's for cutting BOXES! [Needy tries stabbing Jennifer in the face, Jennifer grabs the knife] Jennifer: Do you buy ALL your murder weapons at Home Depot? God, you're butch! Needy: Cross out Jennifer! [Needy slices a bloody "X" on Jennifer's stomach with the knife] Jennifer: [After being stabbed] My tit. Needy: No...your heart. Passing Motorist: So, why are you headed east? Needy: I'm following this rock band. Passing Motorist: Must be one hell of a group. Needy: Tonight's gonna be their last show. Taglines She's evil... and not just high school evil. About this film Jennifer's Body is my favourite movie that I've done. It was overlooked in theatres, but it does have a DVD following. I can't believe nobody wanted to see Megan Fox and me hitting it. They had an extreme close-up of our tongues, and I'm telling you, the thing about the scene is that it's actually really sexy. For a young girl to say that about her own sex scene - it must be because it's special. I think Megan and I kissed really well together. We have similar kissing styles and it worked. We got it done for the masses, and the masses still didn't show up. Amanda Seyfried about her sex scene with Megan Fox in Amanda Seyfried: 'Justin Timberlake, Megan Fox sex scenes were great' in Digital Spy (2011 Sept 13) Cast Megan Fox - Jennifer Check Amanda Seyfried - Anita "Needy" Lesnicki Johnny Simmons - Chip Dove J. K. Simmons - Mr. Wroblewski Amy Sedaris - Toni Lesnicki Adam Brody - Nikolai Kyle Gallner - Colin Gray Cynthia Stevenson - Mrs. Dove Chris Pratt - Officer Roman Duda Carrie Genzel - Mrs. Check Juan Riedinger - Dirk Juno Ruddell - Officer Warzak Valerie Tian as Chasity Aman Johal - Ahmet from India Josh Emerson - Jonas Kozelle Lance Henriksen - driver Bill Fagerbakke - Jonas' Dad External links 1131734 Jennifer's Body jennifersbody Jennifer's Body jennifers_body Jennifer's Body Category:Films directed by Karyn Kusama Category:2009 American films Category:2009 English-language films Category:Black comedy films Category:Supernatural horror films Category:American coming-of-age films Category:Satire films Category:Teen horror films Category:Films about demons Category:High school films Category:LGBT-related films Category:Cheerleading films Category:Films about proms Category:Films set in Minnesota Category:Cult films Category:Screenplays by Diablo Cody