Camp Camp/Season 2

thumb|There's a place I know that's tucked awayA place where you and I can stayWhere we can go to laugh and play and have adventures every dayI know it sounds hard to believe, but guys and gals it's trueCamp Campbell is the place for me and you Season 1 2 3 4 5 Main Camp Camp (2016–2024) is an American adult animated web series created by Jordan Cwierz and Miles Luna for Rooster Teeth. It revolves around the misadventures of attendants and camp counselors of Camp Campbell summer camp, in particular protagonist Max and counselor, David. Season 2 debuted on June 9, 2017, and its final episode released on August 25, 2017. Two holiday specials, "Night of the Living Ill" and "A Camp Camp Christmas, or Whatever" were released on October 6 and December 11, 2017, respectively. thumb|"I have given you nothing to revere. I will betray you all when the opportunity arises.""Quartermaster, to try and show you just how much I care about you-""You'll be first." thumb|I'm sorry, Max. I try to always see the good in things. And I try to get others to see the same, but- pretending things are okay when they're not doesn't help anything. I'm sorry your parents don't care enough, Max. You have every right to be angry. You deserve to be happy, and I hope you can find that here at Camp. Even if it's not today. thumb|Life sucks sometimes, but at least there's pizza. Cult Camp [2.01] David: [singing] I hope this won’t sound impolite, Or come across as too forthright, But even though you seem alright, I... think I’m better than you! [song becomes more upbeat] Now please do keep this thought in mind, That’s just my personal conviction, You’re smart and fun, you’re sweet and kind, I’d call our friendship an addiction, Your shoes are shined, your breath dulce, But still I find I have to say, I... Think I might be better than you! Daniel: [does a violin solo; singing] You seem impressed with what you’ve shown, But I don’t find it that compelling. You’ve sung my praise but not your own! And well, I think that’s pretty telling. But while we’re on the subject of, How I’m superb and leagues above, you, ought to know I’m number one. I know that might be hard to swallow... Campers: [singing] La La La La... Daniel: [singing] This hurts you just as much as me. Campers: [singing] Oooh Oooh Ooooh... Daniel: [singing] But when this song is sung then you and I’ll know, That you’re just a nobody~! David: [singing] Well, friend, I don't know what to say! Daniel: [singing] Try starting with your resignation! David: [singing] So let's end this in the finale! Daniel: [singing] I'm dying from anticipation! David: [singing] You’re really great, but let me state, You denigrate and seem to hate, The fact I’ll break you, abdicate, Before I can asphyxiate, I... Think I might be better than you! Don’t hate me because it’s true! Daniel: [overlapping the singing with David] You've been outdone, Now I've really won, But it was fun, Your end's begun, and... Now I know I'm better than you! And I'll prove it to you, too! David: [singing] Just know, I'm better than..... Daniel: [singing over David's last lyrics] So watch as I identify, The skill to show I qualify, Like keeping up this camp charade, And tricking kids to drink Kool-Aid, To sacrifice them-- [song comes to an abrupt end; normal voice] Oh, wait- [Cut to Daniel being driven away in an ambulance] Anti-Social Network [2.02] [Neil does a mad scientist laugh; Preston is standing there] Preston: Yes, Neil! Love the passion! But feeling a little too on the nose. I need you to sell it to me without saying it to me! Let's do it again; but maybe try to bury your motivations with a- [Neil gets mad and strangles him] bit- more- subtext! Quest To Sleepy Peak Peak [2.03] Jermy Fartz [2.04] Max: So, let me get this straight: Your name is Jeremy Fartz? Jermy: I wish. It's actually JERMY Fartz. It's a family name. But both of my friends call me Big Nips. Neil: Why do they call you Big Nips? Jermy: Oh! Well, you see.... [Jermy then shows his hideous stomach to the campers horrifying them but Nikki, who was enthusiastic] Jasper Dies At The End [2.05] Quartermaster Appreciation Day [2.06] David: I want each of you to go out and find or make a gift that truly exemplifies your love and admiration for our hardworking groundskeeper! Quartermaster: I have given you nothing to revere. I will betray you all when the opportunity arises. David: Quartermaster, to try and show you just how much I care about you- Quartermaster: You'll be first. Bonjour Bonquisha [2.07] Gwen Gets a Job [2.08] Space Kid: Hey, Gwen? I'm standing in ants. What should I do? Should I move? Should I move? [In a flashback, Gwen sits inside the camp office watching TV, turning up the volume and thus not hearing the Woodscouts attacking outside] Max: Help! We're under attack! They're inside the camp! Anybody? Help! Gwen: Yeah. Make his ass take you to Costco. Eggs Benefits [2.09] Space Camp Was a Hoax [2.10] David: Height? Space Kid: This many! David: Weight? Space Kid: ...This many! David: Blood type? Space Kid: Red! David: Gender? Space Kid: Earthling! David: Race? Space Kid: WE HAVE TO BEAT THE SOVIETS! David: That's the spirit! Cookin' Cookies [2.11] Miss Priss: Now you girls are gonna sell Skinny Minties, Lemon Lillies and Coconut Cream Candy Tuffs until every last loser in Sleepy Peak has diabetes! Max: Damn it, Nikki! I told you to pull up! Parents' Day [2.12] Quartermaster: Parents're here. Cameron Campbell: Fuck. David: Max, that is it! I am fed up with your bad attitude! Why do you always have to bring everyone else down instead of try just a little bit to have fun? Gwen: David- [hands him the folder with Max's Camp Camp enrollment form] David: Now let's all put on a happy face, go out there, and show everyone just how great you are at- [opens the folder] um- [David stares at Max's enrollment form; apart from his name and age, his parents wrote nothing about him] Max: I told you. They didn't care. [leaves, fighting back tears] Just make something up so we can get this over with. David: Max, I- I didn't know. Cameron Campbell: And now, for our final, and most important performance- [David and Gwen look at Campbell from behind the curtains, then at Max, who is sitting dejectedly in a corner] give it up for Davey, Gladys, aand- [sees nobody there, then Max's form on the floor] Uh- what the what? Oh, don't tell me I lost another kid! [surprised campers and parents stand up] Uh, that may have sounded incriminating, but- [flees offstage] Max: Why are we here? What about Campbell's big show? David: It's stupid. Max: What? David: You're right. It's stupid. You shouldn't have to pretend for anyone. Max: Are you... okay? David: I'm sorry, Max. I try to always see the good in things. And I try to get others to see the same, but- pretending things are okay when they're not doesn't help anything. I'm sorry your parents don't care enough, Max. You have every right to be angry. You deserve to be happy, and I hope you can find that here at Camp. Even if it's not today. Gwen: Life sucks sometimes, but at least there's pizza. Max: David? David: Yeah? [Max hugs David, then goes back to standing there] Max: That never happened. David: Okay, Max. Max: Seriously, I will murder you if this gets back to the gang! Cameron Campbell: You bastards! You goddamn bastards! Don't you know who I am? I am Cameron C. Campbell! I'm richer than all of you combined! I was the Prime Minister of Thailand for Christ's sake! Agents Miller: Tell it to your cell mates in Super Guantanamo. Cameron Campbell: This is all your fault, Davey! I swear on my Minor League Baseball teams, you haven't heard the last of me... Nikki: So, yeah, that's our camp! Night of the Living Ill [2.13] [An ill Neil and Nikki reach out toward Max] Nikki: Maaaaaax, help us... Max: Don't worry, guys, I know exactly what to do! [cut to Max slamming the cellar door shut behind him] Fuuuuuck that! A Camp Camp Christmas, Or Whatever [2.14] [The first snowflake of the year floats majestically through the air, landing in front of Max, who jumps back, staring at it] Max: What the fuck? Preston: Well, friends, as the children of divorced parents often say: TWO CHRISTMASES! Nikki: What's so great? [excitedly] WHAT'S SO GREAT!? [starts singing] I can't believe the time is here, To deck the halls and spread some cheer! It is my favorite season, Though I can't place the reason, Christmas is my favorite time of year. Max: Okay, you just kinda stated stuff we already knew. Neil: Yeah, we get that you like Christmas, but what is it about Christmas that you like? Nikki: Ho ho! I'll tell you! [singing] We'll wrap our presents good and tight, And shower Christmas trees with lights! Oh, yuletide carols we shall sing, Though I'm not sure what "yuletide" means, But Christmas is my favorite silent night! Neil: [singing] So, you're about the decorations, Hanging everywhere? Max: Don't sing. Neil: [singing] The couples under mistletoe, And snowflakes in the air? Max: No, please. Neil: [singing] The Christmas morning presents, That you open with excitement and delight! So am I right? Nikki: Not quite. Neil: WHAT!? Nikki: [singing] I love the bells on Santa's sleigh. And all the reindeer games to pla-a-ay! Max: [singing] Get to the point before I vomit. Nikki: [singing] I can't just put my finger on it, But Christmas is my favorite holiday! I know my reasoning's unclear, But I'm still smiling ear to ear! Call me "Saint Nik", 'Cause I'll keep giving. So long as I can keep reliving! Christmas is my favorite time, Dont' ask about reason or rhyme, Just know that it is my favorite time of yeeeeeaaaar! [song ends] Max: So what you're saying is, you have no idea. Nikki: Yes! Max and Neil: Ugh!