Agatha All Along

Agatha All Along is a 2024 Disney+ original series following the character Agatha Harkness following the events of WandaVision as she assembles a coven to walk the witches road so she can get her powers back. Episodes Seekest Thou the Road [1.1] "Dottie Jones": Who's the victim? Is she dead? "Agnes O'Connor": Now, why do you assume it's a woman? "Dottie Jones": I don't know. Sounds more titillating. "Norm Gentilucci": [examining a brooch "Agnes" brought into his store] These hotties here? It's triple goddess. Maiden, mother, crone. "Agnes O'Connor": What, no working professional goddess? Agatha Harkness: [to Señor Scratchy, after being freed from Wanda's spell] I got mugged, mister. She took every little bit of power I had and left me with household appliances. We gotta get back on top. Circle Sewn with Fate Unlock Thy Hidden Gate [1.2] Lilia Calderu: What witch in her right mind would join Agatha Harkness' coven? Agatha Harkness: Not looking for right minded witches, as it happens. Lilia Calderu: Witches like you are the reason people think we poison apples, and steal children, and eat babies. Agatha Harkness: Babies are delicious. How old are you? 410? 415? Lilia Calderu: How dare you? Agatha Harkness: Oh, I apologize. You don't look a day under 450. Teen: Years old? Agatha Harkness: You get, what, maybe two suckers a day in here, and twenty bucks later, you're sitting on a bed that's also your wall. Don't you miss the glory days? Lilia Calderu: When I was chased out of every village I passed through for accurately predicting tragedy? No, I do not. Beat it, Harkness. Jennifer Kale: [after "Teen" reveals her current involvement in a series of class-actions lawsuits for damage to health] I haven't been convicted of anything. Agatha Harkness: Yet. Historically, we as a group don't do well in courtrooms. "Teen": The charge has a surprisingly lenient penalty, just, like, payouts, and maybe, like, five years in prison. But 800 counts of it? Starts to get a little life-y. Agatha Harkness: Wait. So you're magically bound, and you're about to get literally bound. "Teen": None of this pedestrian drama would be an issue for a powered-up witch. Jennifer Kale: You think I haven't tried everything to unbind, you freaky little miscreant? Agatha Harkness: Hey! "Teen": You've tried everything but The Road. "Teen": I bid on a limited edition signed LP of the Ballad, but it cost more than I make in a whole summer at the Hokey Pokey Bowl. Agatha Harkness: I don't wanna ever hear those words paired together again. Through Many Miles of Tricks and Trials [1.3] Jennifer Kale: [Referring to having Sharon Davis, someone not experienced in magic at all] Well, whoever she is, she has no business on The Road. Sharon Davis: That's what I'm saying. "Teen": Anyone can be a witch with training. Jennifer Kale: Which puts the rest of us in even more danger and we don't even know what we're up against. Lilia Calderu: "Tame your fears." That's what we're up against. Our worst nightmares. Jennifer Kale: Hey, a bit of advice. "Teen": Yeah? Jennifer Kale: Watch your back with Agatha. "Teen": I know how people feel about her. Jennifer Kale: Did you know she traded her own child for the Book of the Damned? "Teen": That can't be true. Jennifer Kale: Nah. Yeah, you're probably right. But that is what people say. They say no one really knows what happened to him. They say he might be dead. Others say he might be a demon or an agent of Mephisto. But hey, that's what happens when you have Agatha Harkness as your mom, right? I doubt she'd even recognize her own son if he showed up at her doorstep. If I Can't Reach You Let My Song Teach You [1.4] Alice Wu-Gulliver: [while meeting Rio] So, you're a Green Witch? Rio Vidal: Less a Green Witch. More... [in a demonic voice] the Green Witch. Darkest Hour, Wake Thy Power [1.5] "Teen": [about using broomsticks] Why does your generation hate them so much? Lilia Calderu: Brooms have been co-opted by the holiday industrial complex as an absurd emblem of our culture. Worse yet, they're an obvious symbol of female domesticity. Jennifer Kale: And they're basic. "Teen": So that's what it means to be a witch? Killing people to serve your own agenda? No. Not for me. Agatha Harkness: [laughs, then lowers her voice] Are you sure? You're so much like your mother. Familiar By Thy Side [1.6] Lilia Calderu: Live in the now, baby. It's the only thing that's certain. Ralph Bohner: Agatha hijacked my LIFE! GOD DAMN IT! She called me her husband. But I was her puppet. Death's Hand in Mine [1.7] Lilia Calderu: I loved being a witch. Follow Me, My Friend To Glory At the End [1.8] Billy Maximoff: Don’t take all of it. Agatha Harkness: We can't fight Death Maiden Mother Crone [1.9] Agatha Harkness: I do tend to kill my coven members. Billy Maximoff: So do I. External links Category:Miniseries Category:Superheroine TV shows Category:Horror comedy TV shows Category:2020s American comedy-drama TV shows Category:2020s American science fiction TV shows Category:Disney+ shows Category:Marvel Cinematic Universe TV series Category:Works about women