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Bad Taste
Reference material by Wikiquote contributors. This retains its source identity and is not 411 news reporting.
Bad Taste is a 1987 film about a small New Zealand village that is invaded by aliens in order to harvest human beings for their intergalactic fast food franchise, but who are repelled by a four-man paramilitary force.
Directed by Peter Jackson. Written by Ken Hammon, Tony Hiles, and Peter Jackson.
One thing the aliens hadn't counted on was Derek, and Dereks don't run! taglines
Derek
Stick all the bits of brain in a plastic bag, Barry.
Suck my spinning steel, shithead!
I'm a Derek. Dereks don't run!
Stay where you are then, and I'll give you an eye witness description of this, intergalactic wanker!
The headshot's the only true stopper.
What are you dirty hooers doing on my planet?
Well this sure has buggered your plans for conquering the world, eh? Hehe... my friend, the astro-bastard, time for talkies. By the time my colleagues get here I want to have you babbling in some extra-terrestrial language!
Eat lead sucker!
I'm coming to get you bastards. [laughs in a mad way] I'm born again!
Ozzy
[after drop-kicking an alien's head out of a window] The old magic is still there.
The bastards have landed!
[after shooting the alien that was about to execute Giles in the head] I bet that cleared the sinuses.
Lord Crumb's Voice
That's the end of those weekend cowboys!
I'm sure you'll be pleased to be leaving this shitty planet!
Tomorrow we're having you for lunch!
I think the gruel is ready!
The sad news is that we will be heading back to nalak not with six of our co-workers in a state of permanent death. They died today, murdered by some real arseholes.
[after trying to fire on Barry with an empty gun] Oh, sod it!
Others
Barry: I think Derek's turned his toes up, guys.
Coldfinger: I think this is a job for real men!
Lord Crumb: [Sniffing on bowl of alien vomit produced by Robert] Mmmhh, exquisite bouquet, Robert!
Lord Crumb: [drinking bowl of alien vomit] Aren't I lucky, I got a chunky bit!
Dialogue
[barry getting chased by an alien wielding an axe]:
Derek: [on the radio] I think you better kill him Barry.
Barry: Jeez, he could be Ministry of Works or something.
Derek: Nah, he's moving too fast.
Barry: Why can't aliens be friendly?
Derek: There's no glowing fingers on these bastards. We've got a bunch of Extra-Terrestrial psychopaths on our hands. Like a... like a visit from a planet full of Charlie Mansons. They've wiped out a small town for starters, it's my guess they'll go onto something bigger next time. Christchurch, Wellington...
Barry: Auckland?
Derek: Yeah, well that wouldn't be so bad.
Frank: This isn't gonna be another false alarm like the Manor Street invasion over there, is it?
Derek: Well, how do you explain the disappearance of an entire township, Frank? Oh! The Kiwi Jonestown, of course, that's it! Drinking beer laced with cyanide from little polystyrene cups.
Frank: Well, I guess we'll have to issue a gun to Ozzy.
Barry: Yeah, but don't forget about his personality disorder.
Barry: What are we gonna do if we're spotted, Frank?
Frank: Well... I guess we shoot the bastards.
Frank: Just remember, we're only authorized to use violence when protecting the planet.
Barry: And the moon.
Frank: Yeah, and the moon.
[after frank had to drink the "gruel"'']
Frank: oh christ, you'll never believe what i had to do!
Ozzy: umm... did you have to drink some chuck?
Taglines
One thing the aliens hadn't counted on was Derek, and Dereks don't run!
Watch out Aliens... ... here comes Derek!
The Bastards Have Landed!
Crumb's Crunchy Delights.
Human meat for intergalactic hamburgers
Cast
Terry Potter - Ozzy/3rd Class Alien
Pete O'Herne - Barry/3rd Class Alien
Craig Smith - Giles/3rd Class Alien
Mike Minett - Frank/3rd Class Alien
Peter Jackson - Derek/Robert
Doug Wren - Lord Crumb
Dean Lawrie - Lord Crumb SPFX Double/3rd Class Alien
Peter Vere-Jones - Lord Crumb's Voice
External links
0092610 Bad Taste
bad_taste Bad Taste
The Ultimate Bad Taste Web Site
Category:1987 films
Category:New Zealand films
Category:Comedy science fiction films
Category:Science fiction horror films
Category:Cult films
Category:Splatter films
Category:Films about extraterrestrial life
Category:Films set in New Zealand
Category:Screenplays by Peter Jackson
Category:Films directed by Peter Jackson
Category:Films about shapeshifting
Category:Films about alien invasions